How to Break it to Your Family: You’re Dating a Ring-Tailed Lemur
1. INTRODUCE: Hey Mom, hey Dad, hey Uncle Bob, this is my new LOVE.
2. CLARIFY: Yes, (s)he is NOT a HUMAN (WO)MAN, this is a LEMUR, GUYS.
3. REMIND NOT MONKEY: They are a Strepsirrhine Primate, NOT a “monkey.” There is no “MONKEY BUSINESS” going on HERE! PLEASE!
4. DISARM BOB: Hey, Uncle Bob, NO need for you to be a BIGOT about this!
5. STATE DENTITION: The lemur has a deciduous dentition (incisors, canines, premolars, molars) of 2.1.3/2.1.3 × 2 = 24. Do you GET IT now, guys?
6. DISARM MOM: This is NOT about your feelings, MOM, this is about OUR LOVE.
7. AFFIRM SIMILARITY: They are DIURNAL LIKE US and highly SOCIAL.
8. REITERATE LOVE: We’re HAPPY together. End of story, guys!
You DONE it. WOW. It’s LEMUR TIME!!!